My mom’s world

As with most daughters, I was and am attached to my dad. I love him, respect him, and adore him. He is truly my hero. He is one of the very few people whose company I enjoy. Of course, just like everybody else he has his own share of negatives. But once you love someone so much, you learn to overlook those.

What about mom? Well, I was never close to my mom. I don't know why. I love her and would do anything for her. But, in case I had any problem, let me say mom was not the first person I would go to. I was actually slightly afraid of her. I was never able to appreciate her emotions and thoughts. To be honest, there were days when I thought my mom was lucky to have my dad as partner.

But all this changed once I got married. It was truly a revelation for me. I understood my mom better. I got a view of how her world should have been in the past. For someone who came from a financially weak family, who had lost her father a year before her marriage, and who cannot go back to her mom because the family was already struggling, marriage should have posed quite a few challenges.

She had to take care of my dad's two younger brothers. One of the brothers had a few medical problems so she had to prepare separate dishes for him and the rest of the family. She had to wake up at 4 am to complete her chores. Those were the days before phones became part of house hold. So, with no conversation or very little conversation with the family, I can understand how lonely she would have felt. Add to it, her MIL and SIL were not very supportive. She was always looked down because of her financial status. She never raised her voice and was afraid of every one of them. My dad was her only pillar of strength.

I guess all those years of untold loneliness and sorrow was probably the reason she became very vocal later on.

This year Lord has been extremely kind and has blessed me with the opportunity to experience motherhood. Last few months as I am getting ready to become a mom, I understand my mom so much better. Much better than all those years I stayed with her. I am seeing a different side of her – of a practical woman.

As I struggled in the first few months of pregnancy, my mom was with me giving me physical and emotional support all the way. Whenever my dad overreacted on any issue because of the love he had for me and it was difficult for him to see me struggling, she would keep her cool and ask me to ignore his comments. She was the practical woman.

She would tell me incidents of how things happened during her pregnancy, how she had to wait until the 9^th month to go to her mom's place, how my dad reacted when my brother and I was born (looks like his initial reaction of a girl was not a happy one :) I guess he knew that his boss has arrived :)), how she managed all alone with no support, how she would catch a bus and go for monthly check ups alone and many more. All these stories made me truly realize how much she had endured all her life.

After I was born, my mom's younger brother and sister also stayed with us. Mom had taken the responsibility of getting them married to good families. My dad's brother also got married. All these marriages meant there was not much of savings in the initial years. So, from the time we were born, mom and dad sacrificed a lot. They have never spent anything on themselves. They saved every single penny to give us good education. That was their only motto.

Today, though we are in a financially better position, my mom fights for every single rupee that is spent. My brother mostly will be the target. Visits to the theatre, CDs, outside lunch are all ways of wasting money, as per my mom. Given her past, we understand her mindset.

But what hurts me most is sometimes when her innocence comes out. Whenever she asks for cone ice cream, or when she buys some cosmetics, or when she asks for some books, moments like these makes me realize how many years it has taken for her to experience the smallest desires of her.

Mom, I truly understand your struggles and their effects on you. I hope to fulfill every single wish of yours. Love you…!

And Dad, you are lucky to have mom with you. Today, your brothers and sisters are proud of you and us because of mom. Stop fighting with her. :)

Good and bad of June

June, the month that I was so looking forward to, is failing to live up to the expectations. Sigh!

I was so excited that I will be travelling to Singara Chennai in mid-June. No tension, No house work, Lots of chatting, Friends, Relatives, Lots of pampering, Laughter, Love.........the list was so exciting.

But one thing that I never knew was all those people planning to get married came to know that marriage has to be done before June 15th (or 17th actually), failing which the bride will change her decision.

So, I have four weddings in the first half of June in Chennai, all of which I can not attend and none in the second half. Life is definitely not fair, I say! I demand justice. But I dont know whom to ask? :(

Kids are the best I say!

Kids are the best mood-shifters. They have the magic wand to make you jump from a bad mood to happiness.

Imagine a dull Saturday, you are in one of your sulkiest best and with lot of effort move out of your home to a nearby temple just to get some fresh air and at least make your body active. Walk as leisurely as possible, reach the temple, ask the Lord the same stupid question – "Why it happens only to me?", do a few rounds of the temple, feel exhausted, and decide to sit in one corner and look at the sky brooding over something.

You see a few images of people walking past you, of someone looking at you, someone waving at you but nothing is registered in the mind. And then suddenly someone pats at your shoulders, you turn back and look at a kid showing you 4 teeth and waving "Bye" at you. It takes a moment for you to come back to this world. You look at the kid, without thinking hug the kid, give a kiss, and then wave a happy and loud "Bye." Oh wonderful!!! :)

So, you are now happy and walk faster back home noticing all the kids playing and one small girl comes near you and says "Hi Akka!!!" Akka it is!!! After being called 'aunty' and 'maami' (that too on the day of marriage) for two years, it feels great that someone still considers me "akka." No prizes for guessing, I kissed the kid and said "Hi kutty…." :) Life is lovely I say…

Wide Angle - Lovely moments

Well... where shall I start? If I say I am happy, it does not do justice to the feelings of heart.

When I saw the contest conducted by Blogadda to write a tribute to Anil Kumble, I thought I should give it a go. I had not updated the blog for months together because of health and emotional reasons. But cricket is an addiction and really can not stop myself. I finally spent a few hours in writing and at the end of it felt wonderful. It was reliving those moments when I had watched those matches and had post-match conference with my mom and brother. :)

I was happy to win the contest but really did not know much about the book and was not sure what to expect in it. But everything changed when I actually got the book last week. Surely, camera is to capture lovely moments and relive those later. And that's exactly what happened with me. I spent the entire weekend looking at those pics. (It helped that power cuts in Bangalore are at its worst. :( ) Let me leave you with two of my most favorite photos.

1] Rahul Dravid, Man of the match in Adelaide Test.

In this test, Ponting scored 200 and blew a kiss to his wife. And when Dravid scored 200, he kissed Indian cap. Me and my brother, who hate Ponting, started comparing the two and made some really sarcastic comments. :) Oh those days!!!

2] Well, what shall I say about this. Fab five - thanks for all the happiness you provided us.

Thanks Blogadda for the contest and the book.

PS: Pardon the image quality. My digicam did not work and hence pics taken from mobile. :(

Reunion – The End

This post is submitted for the Mystery Fiction Blog Contest at Blogadda. Ajay Nair has written a story called "Reunion," laying out some clues. We are given the chance to solve the mystery.

My take is given below.

After Lila spoke to all the ghosts from her past, she decided it was time to make her move. Each of their actions indicated that they did not love her at all. They did not care for her. Even when they knew she had only a few years left, they decided to come empty-handed with no apologies at heart.

"Life is unfair," she decided. How can those people lead a normal life when she has to die? She decided to execute her plan. She had nothing to lose. She had only a few years left and had no one to care for her. Her desire to live reduced and taking revenge became the priority.

She thought of M. and crumpled his scarf in anger. The porcelain cup brought her memories of those six years and she threw them on the floor in disgust. Thoughts of R reminded her of the beads and she threw them to the bathroom. She looked at the arm band. Yeah, she was the snake. She believed in revenge – revenge against people who did not care for her. The arm band made her realize that even blood relation is not trustworthy and mangled the arm band.

She finally took the bullet from the pendant and killed herself. Last few minutes she felt satisfied that she had acted smartly and the cops will ruin the lives of the people in her past.

Sentences that made me think it is a suicide are:

"Lila was smart"

"In my invitation, she'd mentioned that she'd only a few years left to live and wanted to bury the past."

"Everyone knew she was suffering."

"After all, there was only one person in this house capable of killing Lila." – Well, I thought it has to be all or none. Everyone tried to murder her or no one did it.

And somehow the arm band in the shape of snake made me think of revenge. I know I am following Bollywood tradition. :)

Anil Kumble - The spin machine

If we think of sporting heroes, we can always classify them into two categories.

1. Naturally talented people who worked hard
   
2. Mentally tough people who understood their limitations and worked hard to overcome them
   

Sir Don Bradman, Sachin Tendulkar, Brian Lara, Shane Warne, Viv Richards belong to the first category while Steve Waugh, Anil Kumble, Rahul Dravid, Glenn McGrath belong to the second. The first set of people get a lot of attention, praise, and motivation to succeed; the world looks at the second set only after they succeed. But make no mistake – It's the second set of people who motivate ordinary men to conquer impossible things and become a role model. Such a role model is Anil Kumble.

Great Player - someone who believes in himself and faces challenges head on

"The mark of a great player is in his ability to come back. The great champions have all come back from defeat."

Anil Kumble always had the ability to prove the world wrong. After his test debut in 1990, he waited for two years to record his first come back. His figures of 6 for 53 at Johannesburg proved the world that he is here to stay.

For ten years he was India's match winner. During those ten years, he scripted test series victories against England (1993), Zimbabwe (1993), Srilanka (1994), New Zealand (1995), and Pakistan (1999). Ten years is a long time and though his mind was always energetic, his body needed rest. His shoulder needed a surgery. After the Australian series in 2001, Harbhajan Singh emerged as the first choice spinner and it was increasingly difficult for Kumble to play away tests.

In December 2003, Kumble got a chance to play the second Test against Australia after Harbhajan Singh was injured, and delivered one of his best performances; taking 24 wickets over three Tests as India drew the series. Throughout the series, Kumble demonstrated that he can be as potent a strike bowler overseas as at home and lodges his next comeback.

Injury caught up again in 2004 and was ruled out of the one-day series against Pakistan but made the Test squad. Four wickets on the fourth day of the third and final Test at Rawalpindi scripted India's first-ever series win in Pakistan.

He was declared misfit for one-day and was dropped from the one day squad in 2005. Disappointed Kumble, returned to domestic first-class cricket after six years, in the Ranji Trophy season opener in Delhi. He came back to Kotla for the second test against Srilanka and takes 10 wickets yet again. In 2006, bowled India to a historical series victory in the Caribbean, 35 years after they last did so under Ajit Wadekar. Took 6 for 78 to bowl West Indies out for 219 as they chased 269 at Sabina Park.

He injured his shoulder again in 2006, is dropped from Champions Trophy. He returned in 2007 – announced retirement from one day, scored a maiden Test hundred at the Oval, became the captain of India after Rahul Dravid's resignation, faced tough test in Sydney test with controversies around and motivated the team to win the next test at Perth.

The tale of Kumble is not scripted by God. Because it's not rosy everywhere. It's a tale scripted by a man with an extra-ordinary mind which knew how to overcome challenges, and a heart which appreciated others as much as he enjoyed his own success.

A visionary

Today, if India is ranked as No.1 in Tests, it is because of Sachin, Rahul, Sourav, Laxman, and Kumble. They envisioned it first. They were the ones who could not enjoy the test victories at home. Wherever they went, people told them – "Lions at home, cats outside." They wanted to knock this tag off and they wanted to win away tests badly. And they instilled the same desire in Sehwag, Zaheer, Harbhajan, and a whole lot of youngsters.

While it is easier for the batsman to do it, for a spinner bowling in greener pitches is a challenge. Still Kumble wanted to do it. And his performances of 7 for 159 at Headingley in 2002, 5 for 154 at Adelaide in 2003, 8 for 141 at Sydney in 2003, 4 for 47 at Rawalpindi in 2004 are evidences of how when the batsman scored runs outside, Kumble's pressure was too much for the opposition to handle.

An ardent student

After he broke Kapil's record of 434 wickets, the world accepted him as a master of his craft. Being an ardent student of the game, he added new weapons to his deadly flipper. When he had to take a break because of his shoulder, he perfected the slow, loopy googly, added variations to his leg break, used the crease to great effect, and varied his angles.

Achieving success is easier than retaining it. Because anybody, even if he has not faced the bowler, knows exactly what the bowler's action is, the wrist position, the kind of deliveries that he would bowl, before actually playing a match against him. You have to keep bowling different variations if you have to be successful and these variations brought a new dimension to Kumble's bowling.

Coming from South India where education is the top priority, he took the education a little further. He gave himself homework, analyzed the batsmen, scrutinized his own bowling, and made detailed plans. Such was his discipline.

Gentleman Captain

"Only one team was playing in the spirit of the game."

The cricketing fraternity gave importance to these words because of the man who uttered them. The personality of Kumble, the respect he commands from his team and the opposition, the calmness in his voice combined with truth in his eyes ensured the controversy of Sydney test was outside the Indian dressing room. He kept his cool and led the team admirably both on and off the field.

As a captain who believed in cricket doing the talk, he motivated his team to conquer Perth and bring the much needed happiness and calmness after the storm.

100% cricketer

When we think of Kumble, the first image that comes to mind is this.

This is the most visible expression of Anil's commitment. But let's not forget, it is these long tiring spells and endless commitment that makes Kumble one of India's greatest match winner.

"Anil Kumble became the best cricketer he could be" – Shane Warne

This above quote from the spin wizard himself sums it up quite nicely. Here is a man who extracted every ounce of energy from within to extract the bounce from the pitches.

"You need to teach people how to get wickets, not go on about technique," Kumble says

True, cricket is played in the mind. Once your mind is set to become a strike bowler, it does not matter if you spin the ball 4 inches away to go past the outside edge or if you spin just a few cms to get the outside edge to the first slip.

I consider sports closest to the challenges of everyday's life. Success and defeat happens every day in sports. Watching a sportsman go through the highs and lows are lessons in itself. And the biggest lesson to learn from Anil 'Jumbo' Kumble is "Never, never, never, give up."

This entry is posted as a part of the Contest by BlogAdda.com

Edited to Add: YAY!! I won the contest. Click here to know the details. Thanks to all who encouraged me with your lovely comments and to those who read and did not comment (yes, yes, its you...)

One month……

To all those who came to the blog for new posts, I apologize. Last one month I have realized and understood that "No man is an island."

What's new you ask? It's new to me. All this while I sincerely believed I can take care of everything in my life. In case of any challenges, speak to people; ask them what to do, but do it yourself has been my policy. All this changed last month.

I am self-dependent person. I don't ask anyone for favors. But I realized there will be days when you cannot wake up from bed, when you cannot cook your own meals, when you cannot tie a sari yourself, when you cannot comb your hair and may more…

It was difficult. I fought all these and put up a brave face saying I can do all this. Tomorrow will be normal. How wrong I was. I had to accept that my life has changed.

Am I sounding too negative? Well if so, then let me correct that. The biggest realization of all was that "Even when you do not ask for help, even when you deny others help and say you can manage, parents know the best." My mom and dad traveled the next week and I cannot tell you how I felt that day. No one in life can match the love, affection, and care of parents. I thank God for blessing me with such wonderful parents and pray for their happiness and well being every single day.