Musical Mother

Celebrating " FemInspiration" 100 years of celebrating Women's day. My entry for the same.

In this fast age when people hate to wait for anything and shift jobs ten times in five years to fasten their career growth, I am fortunate to meet women, who have tremendous patience and confidence, a combination which is becoming increasingly difficult to see. These are the women who recognize the difficulties ahead, who know that overcoming those difficulties will take years together, yet are prepared to face them without thinking about the final result.

As I mentioned in one of my previous posts, after becoming a mother, my respect towards all the mothers and women in general, has increased tremendously. But, when I look at mothers of special children, I lose control over my emotions and my eyes become wet.

During my school holidays, I used to go to my uncle’s home for holidays. He lived in an apartment. My uncle’s neighbor was a college lecturer and had an awesome sense of humor. He would make me laugh for hours continuously. His wife sang so beautifully. She gave concerts and played Veena and her voice was totally mesmerizing. They had a daughter and a son. They surely looked happy and were always enthusiastic about life. At that young age, I thought they were all lucky to be happy always. (Not that I had any problems. But you know – Grass is greener on the other side :))

One day, when I was having dinner at my uncle’s home, there was a knock on the door. My uncle opened the door and the neighbor’s son came running inside, started shouting gibberish, behaved very different, and slapped me. I was puzzled and shocked. That is when I realized that the child had mental problems. He would start behaving abnormally some times and he would not stop until all his energy was exhausted.

That’s when I started looking at their family a little closer. Beneath all their happiness, I could also see their determination to create a positive atmosphere at home. In the morning, the aunt would teach her son Mridangam to channelize his energy. He did not go to school. So, she taught him lessons at home. She would prepare special dishes for him – all suggested by Ayurvedic doctors – which would take so much effort. She will never leave him alone. She will keep speaking to him, making him laugh. She would play simple games with him to develop his mind. In the evening, she will take him to the concerts she performed so that he got used to outside world.

And the best part was – She did all this every single day with no complaints or worries. She would also take good care of her daughter. She taught her Veena. Whenever I went to their home, she would speak to me so enthusiastically and would ask me about my day. She would include me in the games that she played with her son. When it was time for me to leave my uncle’s home, she would always gift me with something or the other.

Every summer, as I visited my uncle’s home, I was truly inspired. I could see the boy getting matured. The family atmosphere never changed. In fact it got better with the aunt and her daughter singing and playing Veena and the son accompanying them in Mridangam. Their major success came when he was admitted into a top school in sixth standard. Today, he is a graduate and plays Mridangam for top musicians in the city.

I keep thinking…….

How easy it would be to just complain about the child?

How easy it would be to take care of the child and forget everything else?

How easy it would be to just take care of his physical health and not the mental health?

How easy it would be to just think about family and forget the neighborhood kid?

How easy it would be to just let the neighborhood kid play with her son and forget her?

How easy it would be to keep the child in the home and cut off the external world?

And

How tough it should have been to accept that the kid is mentally challenged?

How tough it should have been to understand his needs?

How tough it should have been to visit multiple doctors – allopathy to ayurveda – and do every single thing that would help the kid?

How tough it should have been to live in an apartment with kids of the same age and understand the difference?

How tough it should have been for the couple to motivate themselves every single day to keep a positive home atmosphere?

How tough it should have been for her to teach him simple things that others perform so naturally?

How tough it should have been to come up with ideas to train the little mind?

She is truly a courageous woman – one who faced the challenge heads on with loads of patience, determination, and confidence, and changed the destiny of the child.

Men are what their mothers made them.
Ralph Waldo Emerson